Early in my career I was mystified at why some of my colleagues appeared to develop much faster than I did. They had more responsibility, got more promotions, or their businesses grew faster, even their relationships were better!

I was mystified as to why. In many cases I had done better than them in school and my early professional career. However, as the years went by and I moved into management roles, the distance between me and these new leaders widened.

Not understanding it drove me nuts, so I decided to find out why. After years of research, observation, trial and error, here are some of my findings.

Delivering results is much more effective and reliable with a team than as an individual.

I may be a top producer, but if I can lead a team, we can move the needle for the entire company!

It’s Who Not How.

A team always outperforms an individual, regardless of how accomplished.

Be civil and polite to everyone.

A leader will be as polite and civil to a Starbucks barista as to a major customer’s CEO. You need everyone around you to perform, don’t waste their energy being a jerk.

Showing respect is simple and profound.

Quickly answer messages, take the call, show up for colleagues meeting on time and participate. In public, always praise, never criticize. When you ask for your team’s time, be ready and prepared. Start on time and end on time. Your team will see this as respect and respond accordingly.

“Catch” Your Team mates doing good and let them know it.

Also, gratitude for what others have done for you will give you the bench strength for when you need it. Thank others often and publicly.

Take Care of Your Mental Health.

For me, being burned out, tired, emotionally drained, or physically sick makes leadership nearly impossible. If I am self-absorbed with my own troubles, I won’t show respect, be polite, thankful, and may in fact act out in anger or exasperation.